The Kraken Has Requested a Transfer ~ Comfort Colors Tee

Two Weeks Notice ~ Written on a Napkin

Resume updated at lunch. Browser tabs that close very quickly when a manager walks past. Even the thing that has spent four centuries sinking ships in one patch of ocean has started asking about openings in other waters, and honestly, it has a point.

• For the coworker with one foot out: The one who stopped laughing at the all-hands jokes and started asking what the pension does if you leave early.
• Farewell gift, slightly premature: Hand it over at the leaving drinks or a few months before, as a hint.
• Transferred to Here Be Monsters: Where the ocean's most feared employee is also looking at other departments.